A Fable

Once upon a time there was a girl. One day she had an idea. It was a marvelous idea. She was excited by this idea and wanted to keep it forever. But she was so busy, and didn't have time to share. she wrapped it up in a pretty box with a big bow and put it in a closet. Safe and sound, she sighed with relief, because now that idea was there whenever she was ready for it.

Life continued on, as it does. Soon she had another idea. This one was even better, so she put it in another box. This was a bigger box, with shiny paper, and gold ribbon. Years went by, and she kept saving her ideas. Things to make, stories to write, things to do, and things to think about were all put away in boxes in her closet. Eventually she needed more space, so she transferred all the boxes into a bigger room. She marveled at how all the boxes were different. There were beautiful boxes with big shiny bows, brown boxes with string, and even several that weren't much more than scribbled words on a tiny parcel. Some she remembered, and some she did not. But, luckily, they were all packed away. And so she went on with her life, secure in her mind that someday, all these wonderful gifts would be opened.

It's not that she wasn't busy. She grew from a girl, to a woman, from a mother to a grandmother. Her life was full of joy and abundance. At other times it was filled with sorrow, and unfathomable grief. At times it went slowly, and at other times she could barely turn around before another year was gone.

Eventually she began to notice that her ideas were starting to show up in other places. She didn't understand, because she knew that they were all locked up in her secret hiding place. But it happened more and more. She was confused because she knew those were her thoughts. Finally she decided it was time to open the boxes and put her wonderful plans into action.

She picked a sunshiny day for her mission, but the sun didn't last. She opened the nearest box and it was completely empty. She turned it upside down and shook it, but it was still empty. How odd, she thought to herself. She picked another one. It was round with amethyst paper and silver stars. She was sure it was probably a good one. Empty again, except for a tiny bit of star shaped glitter. Now she was starting to worry, and tore through all the other boxes, finding nothing but a little more glitter and plain old dust. Paper and ribbons of every color were all around. The little room seemed to be bursting with them.

She was despondent. What had happened to all her beautiful ideas? 

And then she had one more idea and decided to open a Ribbon store. She lived happily ever after, selling ribbons and dreams. She would always give this advice to all her visitors--"Don't tie them too tightly and be sure to use them up".

NOT QUITE THE END

Every fable needs a moral. Remember that our great ideas are not really our own. They are floating around in the universe, waiting for some one to grab them. If you wait too long, they will find someone else.  Don't let that happen.

 So many times in my life I have considered something, and then watched as another person turned it into a successful venture. I'm not nearly as ambitious as I used to be, but I am trying now to use the things that I have been keeping in boxes and in my head.  This little story of boxes of ideas first appeared to me almost half a life ago. And now I have finally written it down.

 

75 at 75--Part 2

 As promised, here is the second part of my helpful hints and useless information. As a disclaimer, I have to say that maybe I haven't actually accomplished all of these. But I am on the path.

38. Make a plan to visit somewhere that you have always wanted to go. It could be a country or a bookstore.

39. Work on a memoir, or even a scrapbook. 

40. Keep some records of the past, but don't save everything. 

41. Read the book "Swedish Death Cleaning." Sounds dismal but it isn't. Years ago, when I was a teen, I liked a novel that featured two spinster sisters who made sure to leave their house 'in dying order' whenever they left. I can't remember the name, and I wonder if they went out much.

42. Hang your pictures, but not too many. Every wall in my house used to look like a gallery wall. Now I'm trying to be a bit more minimalistic. The struggle is real.

43.  Have something you really believe is true, but be open to other people's beliefs too.

44. Try to learn the correct way to do things, but then make adjustments. This is true in the kitchen and in life.

45. Have a regular bedtime. For me, this is one of the hardest things ever.

46.  Get up before everyone else, even if it is only to have coffee.

47.  Make a book of little family stories.

48.  Have a  little space that is just your own.

49.  Visit your happy place. Mine has always been a bookstore. Especially the ones where nobody talks to me. And a coffee bar is a plus.

50.  Have something that you do everyday.

51. Rituals are important. Especially little ones.

52.  Pick a goal. Every day do something that gets you a little bit closer to it.

53.  Do something that scares you. And then remind yourself that you never have to do it again.

54.  Take your turn. I saw a sign on a narrow road near my house that says "Take turns". I love it. It sounds so much like signs I've seen in England.

55.  Only compare yourself to yourself.

56. Take enough photos.

57. Have a favorite:  place, book, food.

58.  Always try new things.  This applies to places, books, and food.

59.  Compliments can make a person's day. Be generous with your kind words.

60.  When you have a brilliant idea, write it down right away. 

61.  Keep a small notebook with you and on your nightstand. It's amazing how quickly those brilliant ideas can disappear!

62.  Don't be afraid to love with your whole heart.

63.  Don't feel like you need to swear. It has become the popular mode of conversation. I like to save my obscenities for the times those words are really necessary.

64.  Re-read a favorite book from your childhood. It's good to see it as an adult.

65.  Become an expert at something. It's your choice. I've heard that you become an expert after doing something 1000 times. Or 10,000 times. You will know.

66.  Mise en place. This French culinary term means to gather all your ingredients and to have everything in place before you begin. I think it can be used in many other situations. Not just cooking.

67.  Leave a legacy. And I don't mean money.

68.  Three ring binders and sheet protectors can really be useful for random organizing.

69.  Start sending cards to people again. Especially for no reason.

70.  I think we should all decorate with buntings and garlands. There is nothing quite so festive.

71.  I got through the saddest times by telling myself "Don't think. Don't think" when I was with other people. And then I fell apart whenever I needed to. Probably not the best advice, but it worked.

72.  The words I've hated the most are "You're so strong".

73.  Using white out tape in a calendar or address book is a genius idea. I don't know why I never thought of it sooner. (Thanks Tricia.)

74.  Always, Always tell your people that you love them.

75.  My favorite quote. I think it is from Cinderella.

Have courage and be kind.

Where there is kindness, there is goodness

And where there is goodness, there is magic.

75 AT 75 Part One

 July was my birthday month. Yes, the older I get the more days I feel the need to celebrate and to share the things I've learned through the many years.  So here are "Seventy five at Seventy Five. A Compendium of helpful hints and Useless Information"

Several years ago I attempted to write a list of 100 Things About Me--after seeing it several times on a favorite website. I only got to 25! So this time I am dividing my list into two parts. As usual in my writing, these wise words are in no particular order.

1.  Stop expecting people to be surprised when you tell them your age. It usually doesn’t happen any more.

2.    Put a few drops of essential oil on a felt table/chair protector and stick it inside a lid (drawers, cupboards, small trash can, box, etc.) They never stick to the chairs legs, but are wonderful little scent keepers for other things,

3.    Don’t spend a lot of time picking out gifts. People will either love it, hate it, or get rid of it.

4.    Only give handmade gifts to those who love handmade gifts and appreciate the time and care involved. Other people haven’t got a clue.

5.    If you are worried about getting in and out of the tub, practice while fully dressed. That way you won’t have to worry when someone comes to rescue you. There are very few things more soothing than a bath.

6.    Always try to learn new things

7.    Travel when you can

8.    Enjoy saying No  

9.    Intermittent fasting. At least it keeps a person from late night snacking. So I keep starting it.

10.                           Stop trying every diet.

11.                           Just be sensible about what you eat

12.                           Take your vitamins

13.                           Keep a travel bag packed with toiletries

14.                           Discover the convenience of dry shampoo

15.                           Get rid of the duplicates in your closet and in your kitchen

16.                           Spend your time and your money on the things you care about

17.                           Read a little every day.

18.                           Notice the time you spend online and resolve to streamline it.

19.                           Don’t watch reality tv. You tube videos are fine

20.                           Make your bed every day.

21.                           Buy new products in sample sizes first

22.                           Love is Love

23.                           Stop joining everything. Be more selective.

24.                           Learn something new

25.                           Try not to be involved in so many conversations about poor health and symptoms, and surgeries.

26.                           Remember to understand that parenting is a world away from the ways we did it. Most moms and dads are just trying to do their best.

27.                           Even though we tried to get away from “the fifties housewife”, she has come back.

28.                           As has “70’s furniture”. And "midcentury modern"

29.                           I really want to have some sort of schedule again. Now most things I do are serendipitous.

30.                           We haven’t really lost the ones we love if we still think of them

31.                           After a certain time, our skills don’t get better. Don’t let that stop you from learning new things. But you may need to lower your expectations.

32.                           Enjoy having time to just do nothing

33.                           Remember the thrill of the hunt.

34.                           Find a new favorite author. Or rediscover an old one.

35.                           Listen to audio books

36.                           Label things

37.                           Always order tiramisu if it’s on the menu.

 I'll be back next week with numbers 38 to 75.

A Meandering Path

Many, many years ago, I began to write a blog. I think it was going to be a sweet little blog, about babies, and children, decorating and crafting. Perhaps I even pictured myself in a pinafore. Swirling.  I don’t remember. Years have passed, and life doesn’t always stay as sweet and magical. Sometimes it has to be lived in extremes. I think that now my musings (and my Muses) are on a meandering path, going this a-way and that-way, backwards and forwards. Just the way that our days go.

Life has been good to us since I last wrote. It's been good since John and I became a couple. Old People Romance. Sigh.  A lot has happened, yet I never recorded it here. We love our house. Moving was one of the best things. Not the actual moving, of course, but the result. Selling the old house felt like it took forever, and was a little bit stressful. I guess St. Joseph really wasn't very happy about being buried in our front yard.  Sadly, I miss my little white cottage (the she shed) and our front porch. The rest of the house never really felt like my own. Even though it was a charming old farmhouse, our new house is much more sensible. Being sensible was never one of my virtues, but it works for me now.  We actually have more space, even though it is smaller. And we are trying not to be the Keepers of Things!

We have traveled with friends, family, and each other. My two traveling friends and I revisited my favorite place in the world (England) last fall. Costa Rica with all the Braffords happened in February. There were fifteen of us!  Clear Lake and Le Claire here in Iowa. A girls' trip to Omaha with my three daughters and teenager Tess will be this weekend. And the grand finale for the year will be an adventure in Italy in October. 

With all the birthdays, graduations, and celebrations, time goes so quickly. I think a lot about what I really want to do. I just had a birthday, so maybe that's why I feel so introspective lately. I always feel that birthdays are the real beginning to a new year and a good time to make plans.

I have been working on a big project. I want to get my old writings into book form. I have saved a lot of what I wrote before I ever had a blog. There are bits and pieces of wisdom and chaos, After I get it all organized it may be a book just for me, and especially for my children. I've spent a lot of time reliving the past and reading my old newsletters, columns, journals, and poetry.  I would love for it to turn into a real book of essays. 

For some unexplained reason, I stopped writing online this year. And now I am wanting to get my pencils sharpened and my voice back again. Any cheering on would be appreciated. Recently, I have been trying to start a little column on Substack. That seems to be where all the people I like to follow are now. So far it isn't going too well, because I can't figure it out. Technology has once again gotten the best of me. I dream of taking a computer class that just teaches me the things I want to know!

Hopefully, I have broken the curse of not having a thing to post. Please look for me again soon.