Sun In The Morning or The Moon at Night

 

Are you a morning person or a night person? As much as I would like to be a morning lark, I am very much a night owl. I would love to wake up, have my coffee outdoors as the sun rises, and maybe do a little Yoga or Pilates as I start my day. But that is never going to happen. Instead, I set two alarms and stumble to the coffee pot and wrap up in a warm blanket. That's on the days that I have to leave the house to be somewhere. On the other days I don't have an established time to wake up anymore. I was born to be retired.

I've always loved to stay up late. As a child I would often read or write in my journal late at night. When I first moved away from home, I would leave my dorm room and spend time in the common area reading or listening to music as my room mates slept. When my own children were young, I would stay up late to listen to the silence and to work on projects that couldn't get done during the day. I admit that I spent some time dozing on the couch while my little ones watched Sesame Street.

When working a "regular job" I had all sorts of hours, ranging from punching a time clock and starting my workday at 5:30 a.m, to working a night shift that ended at 5 in the morning. As a fraternity house mom, I was always up and dressed by 8 a.m. even though I usually didn't even try to go to sleep until a couple of hours past midnight when the party goers came home.

Most of my life I have gone to bed with a book. I would read until I fell asleep and dropped it on the floor. That doesn't work as well with a Kindle. I don't do that anymore because John is a light sleeper and the light would certainly keep him awake. My first husband went to bed at 7:00 and got up at 3:30 a.m. He could sleep through anything except a quiet room. In fact, he listened to the radio every night until I turned it off when he went to work. 

I used to have the strangest dreams when our radio was on the BBC World news programs at night. And then, when I woke up, I often learned they were true. Dreams can last thirty to forty minutes. I can wake up and then go back to the same dream. When I was young, I would have recurring nightmares. That hasn't happened for a long time and I don't miss it.

I try every night to be in bed by midnight, but I seldom make it. If I go to bed too early, I'm not able to sleep. I fret and worry and try to solve the problems of the world or redecorate the house. If I wait until I am tired, then I can fall asleep in five minutes. I still love that quiet time when there isn't any noise in the house. I have heard of people who spend time "going through their thoughts" before sleeping. I suppose this is a kind of mental journaling. It would be a good time to decompress, consolidate, and make a space for closing the day. I may try it. It's probably much better than trying to fix unsolvable world problems.

The majority of adults need seven to nine hours of sleep. There are short sleepers--those who need six or fewer. Martha Stewart has said she only needs three or four hours of sleep a night. She also does Pilates four times a week. I just read her daily routine and now I need a nap. 

Fun Fact: Dolphins and some birds have unihemispheric sleep. That mean that half of their brain sleeps while the other half is awake.

Time Marches On

When is it time to start worrying about aging? I remember when I turned 50 and wrote an article I called "The Fifties Queen" about the ways people's attitude towards women changed. It was actually published on an author's website. (Jennifer Louden, who has written several books.) I thought for a while that would be a huge turning point in my life as a writer.  Obviously, it wasn't because it was twenty-six years ago!

I used to work most often with people who were younger than me. It seemed that as soon as the subject of age came up, I felt like co-workers treated me differently.  I learned that fifty is the age when many women think they are becoming invisible. Suddenly, it seems like your opinions don't matter as much.

Excerpt from The 50's Queen:

"Things change when you are fifty. You are suddenly in another age bracket in surveys. You are no longer the young mother, and you don't feel quite old enough to be wise. Doctors study your charts a little bit more and suddenly start ordering tests just to have a baseline. Hormone therapy is recommended as the immediate cure to any problems that you have now or may have sometime in the distant (or not so distant) future. Every question seems to have same answer-that you are fifty now, and things will be different. If you lose or forget about anything, it is suddenly attributed to your age, even if you have been losing and forgetting things for years."

One of the biggest jolts for me at fifty, was when my mom called to tell me that there was a big sale on underwear at a local department store. "Big, white, cool, and loose" she said. "Just the way WE like them." I was crushed. It was one of those moments when time stood still. She then went on to say that my younger sisters wouldn't be interested, but of course I would. It was a defining moment of my womanhood. I started asking everyone what kind of underwear they bought. I wore sexy bikini panties way longer than I probably should have, just because I didn't want to give in to reality. Now that I am older and wiser, I believe in comfort.

I am still losing and forgetting things, but now my friends and I know that it is because we really are getting older. And sometimes we wonder if our absent-minded foibles are just innocent mistakes or symptoms of something more serious. John and I are watching one another and putting a reminder by our exit door. He is a few years older than I am, so I have been teasing him about things that happen here. He has been known to go out to restaurants in his house slippers instead of his outside shoes. He has also forgotten his wallet more than once. He wears a hearing aid when he wants to and pretends he is listening to me the rest of the time. Sometimes we will miss an exit when driving. I am the one who forgets and loses my phone the most often. Just last night I came home from a funeral visitation and realized that my shirt was inside out. There was a washing instruction tag on one side seam, and a size tag for all the world to see. And of course, all the raw edges of the seams. It's a good thing we have one another for our old age.

WHAT I'M READING: I just started Yesteryear by Caro Claire Burke. It is called a satirical and dark thriller about a trad-wife influencer. I haven't gotten very far yet and am reading it for an online book club.

Tiptoe Through The Tulips

My husband John always likes to be early for things. I think we've had to make a few adjustments since I like to be right on time but have a tendency to be late. Now I ask him what time he wants to leave. He tells me, and I think he is learning not to expect me to be ready to go until that very exact time. For quite a while after we got married he would suddenly announce that he was "ready to go" with no advance warning whenever we had to be somewhere. We finally discussed it and I found out that he thought he was making a joke. It was a line from some television show that I had hardly heard of and never watched. So he wasn't really trying to irritate the heck out of me. He thought he was being funny. I thought this marriage might end before it even really got started.

I tell you this story to explain why we are at The Tulip Festival more than a week before it even begins. 

Pella is a quaint little village about 45 miles from Iowa's capital city. It is a great place to go for a day trip or even a couple of days any time of the year. Cute shops, good restaurants, a town square and, and museums make it a good place to visit at any time.

There are probably tulip celebrations in many little towns with a Dutch heritage, but I'm pretty sure that the one in Pella, Iowa is one of the best.

We visited eight days before the official start time. There were quite a few people around, but nothing like it will be next week. I think we started going early because one year we couldn't find a place to park without walking too many blocks. And I really don't like big crowds.

It takes a lot of planning to make something like this happen. This is the ninety-first year for the festival. The Parks Department and volunteers are responsible for planting over 120,000 tulips bulbs every fall. There are at least seventy different varieties. A sample of each is planted in the Avenue of Tulips, so visitors can see them all at one time. This year our spring weather started too soon, so some of the flowers have already peaked, but there are still many to see. I remember one other time when some of the flowers bloomed too early. There were rumors that more tulips were brought in to fill any gaps. After tulip time ends, the bulbs are dug up every single year. People are allowed to collect them. I hear that is a really crazy time. They do this so that there is a different variety every year. I hear that tulip blooms are the prettiest the first year. After the blooms are gone, annual flowers are planted. We don't have any tulips yet at our house, but want to get some this fall.

I felt a little under the weather today, and was even more bedraggled than a few of the tulips, so we didn't stay long. 

There is always a lot to see, during Tulip Time and beyond, so you can visit the website and also pick up one of the free magazines which gives a lot of information.

Fun Facts: The boyhood home of Wyatt Earp (Brave, Courageous, and Bold!) is in the Pella Historical Village.

Don't forget the Klokkenspel. It was made especially for Pella and is part of the large town clock. The musical bells and mechanical wooden figures "perform" several times a day.

The windmill is also very picturesque. It is one of the tallest working windmills in North America. I have never been inside, but tours are available which include all five floors.

The Opera House is definitely worth visiting. And the canal is very pretty. There are parades and street sweeping twice a day. The costumes are very authentic. The Tulip Queen and her Court make a big appearance.

There are many, many things to see and do in Pella all year long. If you can make the trip, I'm sure you will enjoy it.

EVERYWHERE IT'S CHRISTMAS

Last week I shared some stories about my trees over the years. I probably sounded a little bit particular about what I did and didn't like. (Christmas balls!). I relented a little and bought a few vintage glass balls to add to the tree. I really couldn't find very many, and when I did, the prices were mostly more than I wanted to pay. I love old things, but I don't always understand why keeping them in an old falling apart original box makes them worth so much more money. So now we have some old bubble lights, breakable glass ornaments, and two funny little elves living in our tree. They wouldn't be my choice, but I guess it isn't just my Christmas. John's taste is a lot different than mine. I'm just glad he doesn't insist on ornaments with googly eyes. Actually, the little elves are pretty cute. I found them at Target and they were just the right size for the red ladder.

I'm really not sure what the story is about Target and some of the other stores this year. I was there earlier in the season and thought they were just putting merchandise out later than usual. But now it almost looks like they are finished and clearing it out. I don't know if a large amount has been sold or if it was never in stock.

I'm not one to talk to strangers in stores, but I was so discombobulated by the vast emptiness in the Christmas aisles that I started a conversation with another shopper. She was just as surprised as I was. I will probably be back in a few days and will check again. It seems too early to be clearing it all out. Maybe they just haven't gotten everything in yet. Could this be a result of the tariffs?  Are other stores like this too? I haven't done a lot of shopping this year. I've been ordering online. I have noticed that my packages are taking longer to get here, and that the arrival dates usually change at least once. We have cut our gift lists, and I am making some of the presents. Also, I am trying to shop more at the small independent businesses. 

Even though the big stores don't seem as festive as before, restaurants are going crazy with decorations. I went to lunch at a popular cafe this week, and they had put up even more than last week's pizza place. Every inch of the rooms was covered in sparkle! Dots of colored light fell from the ceiling to the floors, swirling around everywhere. Lights were dimmed to set off the colors. The ceiling and walls were covered and there were trees all over. Every table had a sign reminding customers not to stay more than an hour so that others could enjoy the views. For me, it was just too much.

                                                                               

                                 Pella, Iowa hosted its' annual tour of homes last weekend. Four beautiful houses were open to the public and they did have a large crowd. It is one of their big events every year. I really enjoy the clever ways that the owners decorate their homes. I guess I really am into quality over quantity. Or more likely, imagination over quantity. I don't like seeing bare shelves in stores, but I also feel that everything this year is either not enough or too much. I am feeling very Grinchy-Scroogy and wanting to simplify. HoHoHo.

  

 

Deck the Halls

 Christmas decorating has officially begun! I'd like to say it is all done and the boxes are safely shuffled and stacked back into the storage room, but right now that hasn't happened. In fact, they are all over the house. Things stalled a bit because my sticky hooks just aren't sticking. That means I hang something up, admire it, and then find it back on the floor in a few hours.  

I will never have a Ralph Lauren Christmas. I love the elegance and the traditional colors and the concept of me in a tartan plaid hostess skirt welcoming all the neighbors as I twirl around the room with a tray of homemade goodies. Oh wait, maybe that is a 1950's housewife type of Christmas. I have learned from online videos that for a R.L. holiday, bright red and green are not acceptable, and that gifts should never be given in gift bags. And of course, everyone is always very low key and well behaved.  And the decorations stay where they are supposed to be.

There seem to be a lot of new/old trends this year. Paper chains are appearing everywhere. Yes, plain old paper chains like we made in grade school. I actually love paper chains. They are first cousins to buntings, which are another of my favorites. I crocheted a chain of many colors and use that with greenery. Fifteen years ago I made fabric chains and used my new sewing machine alphabets to write on them. I put names, dates, important addresses, and quotes that I liked to remember on the lengths and then buttoned them together. A lot of the fabrics were pieces of my girls' clothing when I used to sew a lot. I finally decided they weren't going to ever become a quilt. My girls are middle aged now. I still have a few of them to finish. Another project for another day.

I've heard several women say that they are decorating less this year than before. I know some who are even skipping having a tree. I can't imagine not having a tree, but I am putting up fewer decorations. I always like simple decorations. Almost everything I have for my tree comes with a story. I like one of a kind, and I have never been partial to balls and baubles. One year, when I was about ten years old, my mom decided to change the way she decorated our tree. The only things on it were blue and silver balls. I hated it. I think I cried. When I was a House Mom for five Christmases, I decorated the big tree with colorful and unbreakable balls. That was the only sensible way to go. 

When we were decorating our tree this year, John wanted to know where the glass balls were. His favorite trees are the ones with balls, tinsel, and colored bubble lights. I shouldn't have been surprised by that. When I first visited his house there was an almost life-sized Santa riding a rocking horse in his front room. It wasn't Christmas time. He stayed there year-round. We now have a tree in our lower level tv room that stays up all year. And it is mostly colorful round decorations. He loves it. I always wonder why it is there, but now I decorate it for the seasons.

Here is my style of Christmas decor:

And here is John's:

(This is not our home. Abbie's Pizza in Bondurant, Iowa)

Wedded Bliss

 

October 12 will be our sixth wedding anniversary. It's hard to believe that we have been married that long. I still think of us as newlyweds. Crazy young kids. Even though at our age, we should be counting every year as ten. That would make this our sixtieth. How time flies. We've decided to take a few days and celebrate in Galena, since it's such a cute little town and only a few hours away. We spent our original honeymoon in Laramie, even though that wasn't our plan. Our car (practically new) broke down, and so we spent most of our time either driving or being stranded or waiting around in dealerships. It wasn't the best way to start a marriage but we managed to survive it. Our trip was cut short, and we drove our loaner car home and returned in mid-December when ours was finally fixed. This was my first hint that John isn't a great traveler. One of my favorite places in Laramie was a bookstore called "The Second Story". It was upstairs in a building originally used as a brothel back in the wild, wild west. There were lots of little rooms.

The name may just sound familiar since it is what I call my writings. It seemed very fitting since this is the second story of our lives. It was also the name that I gave to my little she-shed cottage. Sadly, I had to leave it when we moved. My cottage and the front porch are the only things I really miss about our first house.

I have a very nice book of wedding photographs, but since it is the middle of the night and I should be packing for tomorrow I don't have much to show. 

Getting married for a second time is very different than the first. Jim and I were very young even though we didn't think so at the time. We were both barely nineteen. Keeping a home and a marriage were both very new to us and we learned together. We were married for almost forty-three years. After that I was on my own for nine years. I became very independent with my time and money. I got used to never telling anyone where I was going or when I would be back. I hadn't dated anyone until I started seeing John. I think we were both surprised that we fit so well together. And we were also surprised that we could love someone again. Every day I am grateful that he came into my life.

Usually, I don't spend a lot of time thinking about what I want to write. I just write from my heart. (I hear that a lot on cooking shows. "Just measure from your heart". It makes me laugh.) This time I really spent some time thinking about it. I asked John what he felt was different about a second marriage and what changes he had to make. He couldn't come up with a single thing. Of course, I had a very long list. Most of them are minor and not very important, but they were still changes in my life. When a person has lived many years as an adult, she becomes accustomed to doing things a certain particular way. And then she marries someone who is also used to doing things his own way. Most of these are not very important at all. They are just things I've noticed along the way. 

When we got married in 2019 I moved into the house where John had been happily living for over thirty years. It was a nice place but it never felt like mine. I always said he had the home court advantage because he had lived there so long. Two years ago, we moved to our house. It's the right home for us.

Here are some of the things that we never really think about because we have always done them our own way. One person has to change. I'm pretty sure it is usually the woman.

How do you make the bed?

What brand names do you buy?

How do you cook certain foods?

Are you a cuddler or do you like to sew and work on craft projects while you watch tv?

What kind of tv shows do you watch?

Do you like to be early or are you always late?

Do you stock up or wait until you are almost out of whatever?

What are your politics?

How do you put the toilet paper roll on the holder?

Which side of the bed do you sleep on?

Do you like to read yourself to sleep?

Do you go to bed early or late?

I'm not saying these are problems! We just don't usually think about why we do things the way that we do. It is hard to change after so many years of being a certain way. And so, we have our own bathrooms and never talk about politics. I am very happy with my Second Story. And I am wishing for many more anniversaries together.

And So It Begins

 

Today I started decorating for fall. This is early for me. I usually put summer away and take some time before I begin with Halloween after the first of October. I am planning to entertain a group of friends on the first, so I am starting now. It's a slow start. We are still expecting some temperatures in the 90's this week, so I don't feel autumn crispness. 

It was my turn to host the same ladies in February, but we had to cancel three times because of weather and illness. By the third time I was so done with it. I was over prepared and under inspired. I had gone through all my Valentine decorating, on to St. Paddy's and finished up with Easter. I don't usually decorate a lot for all the holidays. I do like to have some handmade and vintage items for the major ones. And I like to reuse and repurpose my old decorations. Earlier today this wreath was still on the door for summer. I started adding to it, and with a little ribbon it was transformed. I may add a few more things to it as I unpack the Halloween boxes.

My favorite items for decorating are garlands, buntings and banners. They are very English and I really enjoy finding and making them. I have more of them now than I have available spaces. I guess that is why this one hangs on the shower curtain!

My least favorite thing is that I will be wearing glitter for the next few months. No matter how careful I try to be, I somehow manage to sparkle at this time of year.

I don't really entertain much anymore. When I do, I tend to get into a panic about it. I've never been a person that can be ready for drop in visitors. Instead, I make lists and worry, and wish I'd bought new rugs, and had enough chairs and dishes for everyone. I have downsized so much in the past few years that now I have to buy or borrow household items when I need them once or twice a year. Luckily, I know people.

 I had an acquaintance once who spontaneously invited me to visit and showed off her laundry room. It was more decorated than any room in my house and looked just like a magazine layout. We never really became friends. I don't think that's the reason why, but it may have been.

I went to Hobby Lobby today. It's not a store that I visit often, but sometimes there just isn't anywhere else to go for emergency craft supplies. For me, most of it is overwhelming. There are too many choices, and much of it isn't a style I like. And they choose not to carry anything Halloween anymore! I miss the old fabric stores.

I've written before on my thoughts on Ease, Elegance, and Economy. To these I would add Comfort. I have a house where I seem to live in every room. I do like some cuteness in a laundry room, but not so much that it isn't functional. My newest favorite saying is from a tv show: " I was made for comfort, not for speed." (Vernon Scripps, not a role model, but I do like that quote)

An Old House Journal

Which house is the one with the most memories? Is it our first house or the one where we lived the longest? Is it the house where we were happiest? Or possibly the one where we raised our children?  

This was the house my family lived in for over twenty-seven years. When we moved here in September of 1978, our oldest child was nine. His sisters were seven, four, and two. Approximately. Someone was always having a birthday. The next September, we added our last baby. He always thought the house belonged exclusively to him, since he was born here. This was the perfect house to raise a family. We had over four acres and were in the country, but also within walking distance of a Casey's convenience store. There was a nature preserve over the hill and behind the house, so it always felt very private. Our first house had been on a busy street, so this seemed like a miracle.

Although the area was perfect, the house wasn't. It was an old farmhouse, and it needed some work. The first thing we did was an addition upstairs. The house quickly went from two bedrooms to five, and we added another bath. 

I first saw the house when I was in my early teens. My friend's grandparents lived there and her family lived next door. Her dad was born there. We were never quite sure when it was built. Old newspaper insulation in the attic was dated 1884. Most people settled on 1893 as the correct date, so it was at least 133 years old now. We think it was the oldest house in the area. Rooms had been rearranged and changed a lot over the years. 

We started a remodeling that lasted all of my children's growing up years. They thought it was perfectly normal to have plastic hung over all the doorways to keep out the plaster dust from the old lath and plaster walls. The first winter one of the beds was covered in white every time it snowed. Often it was so cold upstairs in the winter that everyone raced to get out of bed in the mornings and claim one of the floor registers downstairs. Lots of new windows and insulation helped, but it was always cold. It was a house of too many doorways and windows, and many small rooms. It also had a lot of charm and we loved living there and changing it so it suited us. I still miss all the shelves and bookcases Jim built into almost every room.

There were more outbuildings than we needed. Especially after my husband had to build the new garage to house the 1950 John Deere B tractor that he surprised me with for my 50th birthday. Anyone who knows me will realize I am not a tractor kind of girl, so it didn't take much to realize that it was really a present for him. He loved taking care of it and giving the grandbabies rides around the yard. I actually got my first trip to England because of that tractor, so it worked out well for both of us!

My favorite little building was the old milk shed. I had a cottage herb business for a few years when the kids were young, and that became my workshop. I grew many of my herbs and flowers and made wreaths, arrangements and potpourris. I had walls of shelves filled with gallon jars of dried herbs. Those years were happy times, until allergies to oils and plants ended that career.

                                                                              

When our children were grown, it became too big for the two of us. Jim didn't enjoy mowing all those acres as much as he used to, and we no longer needed five bedrooms. He said I would just fill all the empty spaces with "stuff", so we decided to downsize. 

The couple who bought the house lived there for several years without changing much at all. When they listed it for sale, I walked through it, and was surprised at how little it had changed. The wallpaper I loved was still on the sunporch walls. Friends had often teased me because I kept it for many years and never got tired of it. I would still have it again if I could. Seeing my old house looking the same was such a shock, because my life had changed so much. I had lost the son who was born there, and then his father. I moved and changed jobs several times, and then married my wonderful John and moved two more times!

The current owners have lived there three years and made many changes of their own. A few months ago they decided to sell it and I walked through at another open house. This time was a real surprise as many walls had been opened up, and everything had a very modern feel. Beautifully decorated, but it was no longer the home I remembered. There were more changes in store, as the young family decided to stay, and to rebuild.  As I've said before, the location is perfect. They have a darling baby, several horses, cows, dogs, and chickens, and the land is well used. Construction will start soon. Last week all the outbuildings and many trees were taken down. Today the house was leveled. So much of my history was in that house. But they are making their own history now and I wish them well.

(I don't know how many times they filled this dumpster, but all that is left tonight is a small pile of rubble)

EASE, ELEGANCE, and ECONOMY

 

I am a big fan of Jane Austen. Even more than her books, I like her letters. Even though she was born two hundred and fifty years ago, she said a lot in her novels of contemporary nineteenth century life that still make sense today.

She wrote a letter to her sister, Cassandra, in July of 1808 that contained this passage: "In the meantime for Elegance and Ease, and Luxury...I shall eat ice and drink French wine, and be above Vulgar Economy." Jane did like a good vacation.

Many years later I read these familiar words again in another book that I happened to find. This one was printed in  1971, and was one of my favorites when I was a young wife: 

It's out of print now but used copies can still be ordered through book stores. I liked it because it was funny, yet filled with charts and schedules. I remember she said that the only thing she really liked about housekeeping was arranging red roses in crystal vases. 

The words I remember most were her opinions on ease, elegance, and economy. Basically, she said that you can never have all three at the same time. You can always have two of them, but never all. And it changes. If you want to buy something, make something, entertain someone, or just do something wild and crazy for yourself, then one of these will have to be excluded.

It's possible to plan a party with ease and elegance, but not with economy, because you will have to spend more money. You can have an elegant, economical party, but it won't be easy, because you will be doing most of the work yourself. Or you can just throw something together and make it easy and economical, but you'll be missing all those fine touches that make it elegant!

I'm not sure why this has stuck with me for fifty years, but it applies to just about every situation. I'm not sure what happened to my copy of the book, but it is worth reading more than once. I remember making some pretty elaborate schedules when my kids were small. 

Another housekeeping book I liked was this one:

For quite a while I kept my whole life on index cards. The authors' motto was "We change lives with 3 x 5's. They were two sisters, Pam and Peggy, and were hilarious. They had a tv show for a while, and I always tried to watch it. They were even keynote speakers at a convention I went to, and let me be their assistant, because I wrote them a really schmaltzy fan letter. They wrote back to me. I probably still have it somewhere. I finally got rid of all their newsletters, and instantly regretted it.

Another homemaker author I enjoyed was Peg Bracken and her "I Hate to Cook" book and "I Hate to Housekeep" book. As people can probably tell, I am drawn to the funny and the ridiculous advice books, as long as they teach me something I want to learn.

And, then, of course there is Martha Stewart, who tried to make us think that we could have the Three E's, although I never feel that economy is involved. One year I wanted to use one of her Christmas ideas, but I realized that just the ribbon would cost my entire budget. And Martha isn't funny. Impressive, but not funny.

Today, I still enjoy all the housekeeping and decorating tips, but am becoming addicted to YouTube videos. Everyone I see has a perfect life. Recently, I've been watching several of the videos called "Wise Elders Insights." They are filled with good advice for our twilight years, but not with a lot of humor. They are narrated with a very soothing voice that makes me feel like I must have known Jane Austen personally.  (I might be a little touchy since I just had a birthday!) I'm still hunting for the perfect clean your house, organize your day, be clever, and enjoy your life and laugh whenever you can information. I know it must be out there.

What Time Does the Clock Say?

I am not now, nor have I ever been a morning person. I've never really had a sleep schedule, except when I needed one. When my older children were teens, I didn't get up until they were done fighting over who got the bathroom. Every.schoolday.morning. We had two baths, but one had better lights for hair and makeup. After they were both beautiful, then I would get up with the younger ones. With five kids in ten years, there was never a dull morning. I enjoyed staying up late at night, when it was quiet. That's when I was at my most creative.

Spending nearly five years as a fraternity house mom didn't help my sleeping patterns. The House was pretty noisy til after 2am, and there were often fire alarms, police visits, general rowdiness, and cars slamming into our corner drive in the middle of the night. There were eight accidents while I lived there. It was a bad corner! Thanks to my now husband John for being my Prince Charming and rescuing me. (I really did enjoy my frat house adventures. Most of them.)

Just from my past history my brain doesn't want to go to sleep very early. I try to be in bed by midnight, but that doesn't always work.  Unfortunately, the earlier I retire, the longer it takes me to go to sleep. Tossing and turning. Wondering and worrying.  I love to stay up late at night, for a few reasons. I still like the quietness. Sometimes I watch tv, or read, or write, or sew. I drink herbal tea . And then I go right to sleep when I finally go to bed. However, I no longer have the stamina to follow that schedule more than a few nights in a row. When I stay up too late, I get cranky and need a nap. And not just a little nap. And if I don't take a nap, I want to sleep late on the mornings I don't have to go somewhere and be social. Then the only thing that makes me want to get up is the thought of coffee. I love coffee in the morning. I consider it essential. Curiously, I am mostly decaffeinated now, so that isn't my motivator.

This morning, after going to bed at 2:00, I accidently woke up at 6:00 and decided to be productive. I celebrated with freshly ground regular coffee in my french press. It was a gift from a friend, and I enjoy it when I am having an occasion.

          I always believe in occasions. 

Weekly On Wednesday

Recently, I have been trying to put my life into a notebook. I feel like I need to have it written out, so that I can just look things up. The things I need to do, want to do, forgot to do, and will never do. Do other people get this feeling, or am I living just a little bit on the wonky side of life?

There was a time that I did many things. I raised five perfect children. I was the Queen of the Carpools. I kept everyone's schedules in my head and in my planner, and mostly got them all where they needed to be. I had a job that I loved. I made and sold creative things. I volunteered. I wasn't much of a cook, but I kept them all fed. Most of that was my husband's department. After all, we owned a restaurant. No one starved.

Now I have lots of time, and less to do. I feel like I am frittering it away because I don't know where the time goes. I just know that it goes much too quickly. That's why I'm working on the (book!) notebook. Throughout my life, I have kept several notebooks and journals, but purely in a disorganized, mismanaged way. Now I am going through these notebooks, and trying to make them all more coherent.  It may not happen as I plan. I have noticed that my thoughts haven't changed a lot in half a century of writing. I'm not sure if that is good or bad. I like the same things and I have the same faults and values. I am basically the same as I was as a young woman, except on the outside. (And that's another story.)

And that is one of the reasons I am going through all the writings. I  have mentioned before that I like to follow rules. But I have discovered that I am really not too good at following routines. When a routine changes, either for the better or the worst, everything falls apart. And then I need to make a new routine.

 I knew right where things were in the last six houses that I lived in. I love to label things and put them where they belong. In my favorite house I had the best cupboard ever. I bought it at an auction and it had 119 drawers. Unfortunately, it was too big for the room. We had to modify it into two pieces with shelves at the ends. And then we had it built in so I couldn't take it when I moved. That was supposed to be my forever home, but I have moved four times since then. I will always miss that house. I had over 300 drawers and several bookcases. I felt very organized.

John and I moved more than a year ago. We plan to be here until we are even more old and feeble. I love this house. It is a good place for us. We downsized a lot, which was a good plan. However, I am still looking for things. I used to know exactly where my Irish tea set was. And the battery charger to my dremel craft tool. And my spare set of car keys. And the notebook that listed what was in all my little drawers and boxes.  And all of my craft supplies. But now, there is chaos. Our lives have slowed down a lot but the days haven't and every day ends before I feel that I have conquered that chaos.

I still have a few of my labeled drawers. One is metal and I know John doesn't like it. But I think it's charming in an industrial sort of way.

Most of my things are in small boxes and drawers now, and I spend way too much time trying to find what I need. 

My dream is still to find the perfect cupboard again even though I know my dream should be to get rid of the things I like to put into drawers.

APRIL SHOWERS

I live in an area where winter drags along for months and months, and we still experience an April blizzard every few years. I never find myself rushing into springtime. We turn the furnace off and on again a few times before we are ready to open the windows and enjoy the weather. But now the daffodils are blooming, and the flowering trees and bushes are everywhere. I think it just might be safe now, even though we had a dusting of snow last week.

It's been said that Spring is nature's way of saying, "Just one more time". This is the time for change and renewal, so I thought I would list a few ways to celebrate the season.

Go outside. Renew your acquaintances with the neighbors. Take a walk in the park. Play on the swings. Fly a kite. Hit some golf balls. Find a five year old to help you.

Visit a garden center. Mulch. Buy seeds. Plant vegetables. Plan a kitchen garden. Start a small herb garden. Buy some plants and put them in unusual containers. Just about anything can work, if you can put a drainage hole in it. Old decorative tins, pottery, mixing bowls, wooden boxes, broken chairs, leather pocketbooks and shoes are just a few containers. Try to stop yourself before you are putting geraniums in old plumbing fixtures.

Put your house up for sale. If that's a little drastic, then just pretend that you are going to move. Visit some Open Houses in your area and get new decorating ideas. Clean a closet. Give things away. Have a garage sale. Consider renting a space or a display case in a consignment mall or flea market. Many places will rent space for just a few months.

Start a fitness program--Every year it surprises and scares me when I realize that I can't keep wearing jackets and sweaters every day. Enroll in an exercise class, or start walking. And, no, it is never too late.

Go and do something just for yourself. Buy a fabulous spring bouquet. Have a department store makeover. Read a book out on the deck. Eat Girl Scout cookies.

I'd love to say that I do all these suggestions. Last year I put my herbs in an old tin bucket, and didn't add any drainage holes because it already looked pretty holey. It wasn't enough, and they only lasted half the season. Do as I say, not as I didn't.

It was our first spring and summer since we moved. It was exciting to see what flowers we had here at our new to us house. And now this year, we will know what to add. I am hoping that we have lilacs. Absolutely there will be zinnias. I love the bright colors and being able to cut them to bring inside. And marigolds need to go somewhere. We would like to add more rosebushes. We don't have a vegetable garden anymore. We just rely on the local farmers' market. One of our neighbors is a most prolific gardener, and is already spending hours outside every day. I'm hoping to get to know her better this year.

APRIL

The roofs are shining from the rain.

 The sparrows twitter as they fly,

 And with a windy April grace 

The little clouds go by. 

Yet the back-yards are bare and brown 

With only one unchanging tree— 

I could not be so sure of Spring 

Save that it sings in me.

 -- Sara Teasdale

 

 

Happy Valentine's Day

You'd never know the thoughts that grow

Within this heart of mine

Unless I told you in this way

My charming Valentine

I seldom entertain. But every once in a while, it is my turn and I go into a frenzy of getting ready. Months ago I decided it would be a good time to have our Questers group over in February for our monthly meeting and to see the house. Christmas would be put away and everything would look nice and well behaved after the holiday. It is not a secret that I am not a "just drop in anytime" kind of homemaker. If I don't know you are stopping by, I am very likely to have a mountain of some kind of project going on. Or I may be in my jammies, drinking tea and eating bon bons. But if I plan something, I want it to be perfect, at least in my head, if not in my house. 

We have had a very temperate winter here. Hardly anything you could call winter weather at all, especially for Iowa. But on the first Wednesday of February we had ice. Enough to make us all stay inside if we had any sense at all. So of course, my little meeting was cancelled. We moved it to the next Wednesday. So, naturally, we had a snow storm. And we cancelled again. I am trying one more time. Next week will be my post Valentine party with hearts and flowers that have been around just a little bit too long! And maybe a few St. Paddy's touches and Easter decor thrown in just for good measure.

My friends are lovely ladies but I am just a little intimidated by their beautiful houses and amazing antique collections. Questers is an international group that "keep history alive by supporting preservation, restoration, and education."  Small chapter groups meet once a month, and always have a program. Everyone shares a love of antiques and historical items.

 I grew up in a house filled with antiques and have collected a lot in the past. But I have moved many times in the last several years. Each time I have pared things down more and more. This last time we got rid of tons of stuff. I do not exaggerate. Of course, now I ask myself why I didn't keep the extra silverware? And enough dishes? And maybe a tablecloth? And more chairs? And all the cute, quirky, interesting items that used to be on my shelves and hang on my walls? I think I stay awake at night lately
wondering if my house is boring.

I'm not sure what happened here. This started out to be a post about the history of valentines. I have no discipline. No discipline at all.  

You'd never know the thoughts that grow

Within this heart of mine

UNDECORATING

 The Twelve Days of Christmas are officially over on January the sixth. This is the traditional official time to put the holiday away. According to Irish custom, everything should be back to normal by that day. If it is all packed away by Epiphany, that brings good luck. I am all about the customs that promise luck.

I've been undecorating for the past several days. I saved the tree for today. I know a lot of people do it earlier, but I think it looks a little forlorn,  now that it is ready to be put downstairs in the storage area with all the boxes. Some want everything gone by December 26th. Since our celebrations are usually later, I don't think I could ever handle that. And to me, it just feels like much too soon. I really enjoy the decorations. I also enjoy the undecorating. I like packing every thing away in small boxes and big totes. I wrap a lot of the ornaments in tissue for safekeeping, and because it feels like a surprise when it's time to unwrap them. I enjoy that I have such a variety of ornaments, ranging from handmade for my first tree over fifty years ago, to ornaments from friends, and from places we've traveled, and ones that John and I have collected. This was our sixth Christmas together. Our decorated tree contains a lifetime story.

One thing left to do on January 6th is to put all the small nativity sets away. The Epiphany is the day to celebrate the arrival of the Three Kings. They are also called the Magi or Three Wise Men. It just doesn't seem right to put them away any earlier.

Another Irish custom that I've discovered is Nollaig Na mBan. This means "Little Christmas" or "Women's Christmas". Since January 6 is the end of all the Christmas cooking and decorating and undecorating, it's time for the women to finally take the day off. Organize a women's party or just a cup of tea and a visit with a friend.

CHRISTMAS COUNTDOWN DAY 5

 A CHRISTMAS WISH

What is Christmas without goodies? Find a recipe and make it your specialty

I don't think I have ever had a baking specialty.  No one ever begs me to bring my wonderful whatever to gatherings. I have to admit I look for the easiest and quickest recipes. My motto is "If it takes longer to make it than to eat it, then I probably won't make it."

But there is something about this time of year that makes most of us want to stir up a little something in our Christmas kitchens. Or at least to put on a cute and festive apron. This year we almost had a mother and daughters baking day, but it had to be cancelled at the last minute. Maybe we can still make it happen later. I do like Christmas goodies. Especially if I have helpers.

When my oldest son was in kindergarten, he brought home a recipe from the teacher for cranberry orange bread. This was fifty (!) years ago and I had only heard of pumpkin and banana breads, so I thought it was very exotic. It did become a favorite.

CRANBERRY ORANGE BREAD

• 2 cups flour
• ▢1/2 cup sugar
• ▢1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
• ▢1/2 teaspoon salt
• ▢grated zest of 1 large orange
• ▢2/3 cup fresh orange juice
• ▢2 eggs lightly beaten
• ▢1/3 cup vegetable oil
• ▢1 1/4 cups fresh cranberries
• ▢1/2 cup chopped pecans are optional

Instructions

• Preheat the oven to 350ºF.  Line a 9x5-inch loaf pan with parchment paper and spray with nonstick cooking spray.
• Sift the flour, sugar, baking powder and salt together in a large bowl.  Stir in the orange zest.  Make a well in the center and add the orange juice, eggs and vegetable oil.  Stir gently, just until almost combined.  Fold in the cranberries and nuts, making sure you don’t over mix the batter.
• Pour the batter into the prepared loaf pan.  Bake in the preheated oven until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean, about 45 minutes. 
• Let the bread cool in the pan for 10 minutes, then remove to a cooling rack to cool completely.

Please note this is made with fresh or frozen cranberries and fresh orange juice. That is the secret.

I have also made cranberry orange cookies especially when I need to take something to a cookie exchange. These are made with dried cranberries .

Cranberry Orange Cookies

3/4 cup softened butter

1 cup sugar

1 egg

2 cups flour

1 1/2 t. baking powder

1/4 t baking soda

1/2 cup chopped dried cranberries

1 T orange zest

Preheat oven to 350. Mix butter and sugar til light and fluffy. Add egg. Combine dry ingredients in separate bowl. Add to dry ingredients  and mix lightly. Fold in berries and orange zest. Shape in one inch balls and roll in orange sugar (1/2 cup sugar and 1T. orange zest.) Place on baking sheet and flatten. Bake for 10 to 13 minutes.

That's it for today's baking lesson. Like I said, I never claim to be an expert cook.  That's really quite ironic since I have spent most of my life married to restaurant owners. Twice. But that's a story for another day.