Time Marches On

When is it time to start worrying about aging? I remember when I turned 50 and wrote an article I called "The Fifties Queen" about the ways people's attitude towards women changed. It was actually published on an author's website. (Jennifer Louden, who has written several books.) I thought for a while that would be a huge turning point in my life as a writer.  Obviously, it wasn't because it was twenty-six years ago!

I used to work most often with people who were younger than me. It seemed that as soon as the subject of age came up, I felt like co-workers treated me differently.  I learned that fifty is the age when many women think they are becoming invisible. Suddenly, it seems like your opinions don't matter as much.

Excerpt from The 50's Queen:

"Things change when you are fifty. You are suddenly in another age bracket in surveys. You are no longer the young mother, and you don't feel quite old enough to be wise. Doctors study your charts a little bit more and suddenly start ordering tests just to have a baseline. Hormone therapy is recommended as the immediate cure to any problems that you have now or may have sometime in the distant (or not so distant) future. Every question seems to have same answer-that you are fifty now, and things will be different. If you lose or forget about anything, it is suddenly attributed to your age, even if you have been losing and forgetting things for years."

One of the biggest jolts for me at fifty, was when my mom called to tell me that there was a big sale on underwear at a local department store. "Big, white, cool, and loose" she said. "Just the way WE like them." I was crushed. It was one of those moments when time stood still. She then went on to say that my younger sisters wouldn't be interested, but of course I would. It was a defining moment of my womanhood. I started asking everyone what kind of underwear they bought. I wore sexy bikini panties way longer than I probably should have, just because I didn't want to give in to reality. Now that I am older and wiser, I believe in comfort.

I am still losing and forgetting things, but now my friends and I know that it is because we really are getting older. And sometimes we wonder if our absent-minded foibles are just innocent mistakes or symptoms of something more serious. John and I are watching one another and putting a reminder by our exit door. He is a few years older than I am, so I have been teasing him about things that happen here. He has been known to go out to restaurants in his house slippers instead of his outside shoes. He has also forgotten his wallet more than once. He wears a hearing aid when he wants to and pretends he is listening to me the rest of the time. Sometimes we will miss an exit when driving. I am the one who forgets and loses my phone the most often. Just last night I came home from a funeral visitation and realized that my shirt was inside out. There was a washing instruction tag on one side seam, and a size tag for all the world to see. And of course, all the raw edges of the seams. It's a good thing we have one another for our old age.

WHAT I'M READING: I just started Yesteryear by Caro Claire Burke. It is called a satirical and dark thriller about a trad-wife influencer. I haven't gotten very far yet and am reading it for an online book club.

READING AND WRITING

 I was completely and totally mesmerized by this novel. I started to read it a few nights ago and finished it the next day. (304 pages). It is a book that will stay with me. Basically, it is about a woman in her seventies who has been writing letters to people for most of her life. The book covers the correspondence between 2012 and 2022. There are letters to people she loves and has loved, people she admires, people she is upset with, people she never got along with at all, and people she has never met. She writes to authors to let them know what she thinks of their books. Almost everyone answers her letters. Sometimes a new friendship starts. That's it. The entire book is letters, except for a few emails. I have learned this is called an epistolary. I may have already known that. It is like reading some one's diary, but maybe with permission. Little by little we discover the joys and sorrows and regrets of her life, and our own. There are parts of this book that I really identify with, but most of it is very different than the person I am. I do love the way she organizes her life, and sits at her desk with her favorite pens and paper and beautiful penmanship. She and her dearest friend always close their letters by adding the name of whatever book they are reading.

One of the reasons that I am so taken with this book, is that I recently resolved to start writing letters again. A few weeks ago, I copied a "pledge" to write at least one letter every Sunday. I haven't gotten very far with it yet, but I have hope.

When I was younger, I wrote a lot of letters, and almost always had a penpal. For most of my teen years, I wrote to a girl in India. Her name was Aruna, and we sent each other little gifts. She always wanted me to come visit. And then we both grew up and grew apart. I had another pen friend from the east coast. She was named Faith and seemed to live a life that was much wilder and adventurous than mine. Maybe it was real, but I never knew. She would sneak out of her house at night, and meet up with older boys, and then send me long letters about them. Perhaps she writes steamy novels about them now. I had a lot more in common with Aruna. I had many friends that I kept in touch with through letters for a long time. Now we sometimes email or communicate through Facebook. Not as much as I want to, though. I regret the times I didn't write when I should have.  Now that I have decided to write again, maybe I will be able to do that. I've bought real stationery and may try fountain pens again. And sealing wax. Oh, the possibilities. 

A LITTLE BIT OF THIS, A LITTLE BIT OF THAT

I am still recovering from my bout of shingles, so the brain fog continues. Last Friday I handed someone a tape measure when she asked for a camera, and I am blaming that on the medications.  It's been a mixture of good days and days of napping. And that's all I have to say about that.

January is one of my main months of making plans and getting myself organized in my house and in my head. I usually start out with at least a few resolutions and always try to pick a "word of the year". I really haven't thought about it much this month, but here is what I came up with:

  1. Lose weight. My husband has lost more than 30 pounds this year just by deciding he would. I have lost the same 4 pounds about 30 times.

  2. Exercise more. That should be easy, since I have hardly moved at all so far in 2026.

   3. Find the lost things that keep wandering about and that I keep wondering about.

4.  Spend some more time working on my writing. I really want to have a book of essays.

   5. Finally, get all of Christmas put away and organized into the correct boxes. 

I think that might be a To Do List and not resolutions!

Next is my Word of the Year. This year it is a phrase: "Creative Forager".

There is a reason. I want to spend more time creating and I really mean to look through and use so many of my supplies without buying a lot of new things. I really want to let the things go that I don't need.

It's that time of year.  And I may be just a little bit late!

  

When I share that I have a blog the most common reaction is surprise. Because I write but also surprise that people still read blogs. I hear they are going quite out of style. I guess that is because reading takes too long. Even though my little articles take about two minutes to get through, that is too much time for modern readers.   I love to read but I find that I don't have the attention span that I used to possess. I keep checking out too many books from the library, but many of them are returned unloved and unread. 

 When I was unhappy, I used to journal almost every day but changed that habit after I got married to John. Now I keep a lot of random notebooks with thoughts and lists and things I learn from people who make vlogs and videos. I started watching them to see what they were like and if I would ever be able to film one. (I think no is the answer.) I do have a small tripod but have never tried to use it. If I had started years ago maybe I would have liked to have been an Influencer, but now the thought of it all is just too much. I have several you tube videos that I like to watch. A favorite is Jennifer L. Scott. She has written several books and started her Madame Chic series after spending a college semester in France. Now she is my idea of a perfect homemaker. Her house always looks quiet and perfect. She dresses beautifully, exercises on schedule, and gets up at 5:00 am to make her videos and write her latest book. I never see signs of her husband and four home-schooled children. I am enthralled just watching her cook and paint her fingernails. Not at the same time of course, but she probably could. 

There are so many more that I like to watch. An American countess who tours British historic homes is another favorite. I always like a good tour guide. There are so many women who live in perfect little cottages and wear velvet capes when they go outside to frolic in the snow. As you see, in my fantasy life I dwell in the possibility of perfection. (Apologies to Emily Dickenson)

****************

In our family September is the cruelest month. Even after all these years, I still spend most of the month in a fog. The closer it gets to the end of the month the more my mind jumps all over the place. Rich died fifteen years ago on September 23. It is by remembering that we keep our loved ones with us, but it never becomes easy. I miss you, Richie. Love, Mom

Reading and Writing

 I do my best writing in the middle of the night. But last night I decided to let it wait. It's still Wednesday so technically I am keeping my write-once-a-week promise to myself, but I am spending way too much time today just getting lost in computer land. There is so much going on this week, in the world, and in my own little area of the world that I just can't keep a focus on one thing only.

 Almost everything in my life revolves around books. There are books on any subject we can imagine.

We are having a much needed rainy day today, so nothing sounds better than a cozy nook, a good book, a blanket, and a cup of tea. Although I can't stop collecting books, I don't read nearly as much as I used to. I try to read at least a couple of chapters of whatever novel I want to finish every day. I am a grand one at making promises to myself. Sometimes I keep them. Other times I don't.

I am also a big fan of self-help books, diet books, and cook books. Oh, and all kinds of crafting books, histories, and biographies. About the only things I don't want to read are true crime stories. And, if it's a novel, then it must have a happy ending.

I have never been in a book club. A couple of online ones, but that's not the same. When we were dating, John said he'd like to start a book club, but he wanted to be the only one who talked. I think he just liked the idea of reading a book and then telling his audience (me) about it.

When I was googling all sorts of ideas today, I first saw ads for anxiety book shelves. I learned a lot about anxiety in a few clicks, and may write more about it later. There is so much for people to be anxious about lately.  These are boxes with a glass front that contain miniature books in a bookcase. The idea is to arrange it however you want and then shake it so the books fall out. Then you can rearrange it. I guess this helps with stress but that makes me feel stressed just by thinking about it.

I have a little bookshelf that I am planning to use in a Christmas miniature scene. I won't be knocking it over on purpose though.

The quotes I used in these photos are by Dr. Seuss.  I made the pictures using AI. I am just beginning to learn about it. It is amazing to say what I want and it just happens. I am only using the free setups so it's pretty limited but it's lots of fun. Unfortunately, this time I spent more time playing than writing.

MIDNIGHT MUSINGS

 

Happy September. This is the first of the autumn months that rhyme with Remember. For many of us, it is a favorite month, and also a month of contrasts. Some of my happiest memories are in Septembers, and also some of my worst.  Tonight, I have been going a little wonky looking for a specific computer file and bringing up just about every memory I have kept for the last many, many years. My trips down memory lane are always a little on the melancholy side. I don't really like to relive old memories and peruse forgotten photos. I know that isn't a popular thing to say, and I feel guilty for even thinking it, but it makes me feel sad. I have a wonderful life and I try to enjoy every minute of it, but when I look back, I always go into "woulda, coulda, shoulda" mode. I think I feel like everything goes too quickly. When I look at old pictures or read essays I wrote years ago, I wonder where the time went, and why I didn't get more done. I need to make a September resolution to count the things I've accomplished, and not just the projects and ideas that fizzled.  

I have accomplished one big (for me) thing so far this month. My recent blog post about my old house is in a new local newspaper called "The Highland Scribe". It is published monthly, and 5,000 copies are delivered to businesses on the north side of the city. It has space for ads, and articles about local businesses, but also asks for creative contributions. My goal is to have articles published more frequently and in other venues. This was something that I wanted to do in the past, but never followed through with it. I am particularly excited that my blog address is included.

And I admit that I am tickled to be called Local Author!

What Time Does the Clock Say?

I am not now, nor have I ever been a morning person. I've never really had a sleep schedule, except when I needed one. When my older children were teens, I didn't get up until they were done fighting over who got the bathroom. Every.schoolday.morning. We had two baths, but one had better lights for hair and makeup. After they were both beautiful, then I would get up with the younger ones. With five kids in ten years, there was never a dull morning. I enjoyed staying up late at night, when it was quiet. That's when I was at my most creative.

Spending nearly five years as a fraternity house mom didn't help my sleeping patterns. The House was pretty noisy til after 2am, and there were often fire alarms, police visits, general rowdiness, and cars slamming into our corner drive in the middle of the night. There were eight accidents while I lived there. It was a bad corner! Thanks to my now husband John for being my Prince Charming and rescuing me. (I really did enjoy my frat house adventures. Most of them.)

Just from my past history my brain doesn't want to go to sleep very early. I try to be in bed by midnight, but that doesn't always work.  Unfortunately, the earlier I retire, the longer it takes me to go to sleep. Tossing and turning. Wondering and worrying.  I love to stay up late at night, for a few reasons. I still like the quietness. Sometimes I watch tv, or read, or write, or sew. I drink herbal tea . And then I go right to sleep when I finally go to bed. However, I no longer have the stamina to follow that schedule more than a few nights in a row. When I stay up too late, I get cranky and need a nap. And not just a little nap. And if I don't take a nap, I want to sleep late on the mornings I don't have to go somewhere and be social. Then the only thing that makes me want to get up is the thought of coffee. I love coffee in the morning. I consider it essential. Curiously, I am mostly decaffeinated now, so that isn't my motivator.

This morning, after going to bed at 2:00, I accidently woke up at 6:00 and decided to be productive. I celebrated with freshly ground regular coffee in my french press. It was a gift from a friend, and I enjoy it when I am having an occasion.

          I always believe in occasions. 

Weekly On Wednesday

Recently, I have been trying to put my life into a notebook. I feel like I need to have it written out, so that I can just look things up. The things I need to do, want to do, forgot to do, and will never do. Do other people get this feeling, or am I living just a little bit on the wonky side of life?

There was a time that I did many things. I raised five perfect children. I was the Queen of the Carpools. I kept everyone's schedules in my head and in my planner, and mostly got them all where they needed to be. I had a job that I loved. I made and sold creative things. I volunteered. I wasn't much of a cook, but I kept them all fed. Most of that was my husband's department. After all, we owned a restaurant. No one starved.

Now I have lots of time, and less to do. I feel like I am frittering it away because I don't know where the time goes. I just know that it goes much too quickly. That's why I'm working on the (book!) notebook. Throughout my life, I have kept several notebooks and journals, but purely in a disorganized, mismanaged way. Now I am going through these notebooks, and trying to make them all more coherent.  It may not happen as I plan. I have noticed that my thoughts haven't changed a lot in half a century of writing. I'm not sure if that is good or bad. I like the same things and I have the same faults and values. I am basically the same as I was as a young woman, except on the outside. (And that's another story.)

And that is one of the reasons I am going through all the writings. I  have mentioned before that I like to follow rules. But I have discovered that I am really not too good at following routines. When a routine changes, either for the better or the worst, everything falls apart. And then I need to make a new routine.

 I knew right where things were in the last six houses that I lived in. I love to label things and put them where they belong. In my favorite house I had the best cupboard ever. I bought it at an auction and it had 119 drawers. Unfortunately, it was too big for the room. We had to modify it into two pieces with shelves at the ends. And then we had it built in so I couldn't take it when I moved. That was supposed to be my forever home, but I have moved four times since then. I will always miss that house. I had over 300 drawers and several bookcases. I felt very organized.

John and I moved more than a year ago. We plan to be here until we are even more old and feeble. I love this house. It is a good place for us. We downsized a lot, which was a good plan. However, I am still looking for things. I used to know exactly where my Irish tea set was. And the battery charger to my dremel craft tool. And my spare set of car keys. And the notebook that listed what was in all my little drawers and boxes.  And all of my craft supplies. But now, there is chaos. Our lives have slowed down a lot but the days haven't and every day ends before I feel that I have conquered that chaos.

I still have a few of my labeled drawers. One is metal and I know John doesn't like it. But I think it's charming in an industrial sort of way.

Most of my things are in small boxes and drawers now, and I spend way too much time trying to find what I need. 

My dream is still to find the perfect cupboard again even though I know my dream should be to get rid of the things I like to put into drawers.

LIFE RULES

 

Many years ago, when my five children were growing up, and our house was in happy chaos, I heard the words "It's not fair" several times a day. Whether it was about who got the biggest treat, who went to bed first, or whose turn it was to wash the dishes, nothing was fair in their world. And my all purpose answer was always that it wasn't fair but it evens out.

Recently our world has been hit by too many things that make us want to shake our fists in the air and shout--"It isn't fair"--. War, protests, accidents, natural disasters, so many things that don't seem to have a reason. I like to know a reason for everything. I like rules. I like the fact of cause and result. Here are a few of the things that help me. These are the LifeRules that I am working toward. I don't always remember them, but when I do, they give my life a little more meaning and balance.

I believe we need to be generous.  Many times I've noticed that what we give comes back to us in many ways. Always be willing to share what you have. Be generous with your time, with your money, and with yourself.

Do you know someone who just seems to be lucky? I have a couple of friends who are. I can count on them to be the winners at raffles and lotteries, to get the best seats, and to always have things given to them. I admit that sometimes I feel a little jealous and get a bad case of the Poor Me's and feel that life isn't fair. Yes, I have been known to whine. Over time, I have noticed that these lucky women are always giving. They think about others and are there with help, and gifts, and acts of kindness. And this generosity finds it way back to them again and again.

I believe we need to be grateful. Appreciate what you have, both the big and the small. Try to remember to take time to notice the miracles that surround us. The more you look, the more you will find. 

And I believe we need to be prepared.  We never know what the future holds. The only certainty about life is its' uncertainness. Have a plan, both for your day, and your future. Do you know what important things you would need in an emergency? Do you have the necessary supplies? Do you know what really matters to you and why? Take some time, take stock, and think about where you are going in life and what you need.

Life isn't fair, but it evens out. Remember that, because it keeps us traveling in the direction that we need to be moving.  

2025 ADDENDUM:  

Recently I have been sorting through some of my old writings. They are musings I wrote after I got my first computer, and years before I started a blog. Although many seem outdated now, I am dusting them off and posting them here on The Second Story. I am planning to put them all together for that elusive book I sometimes talk about. (It will at least be organized for my children.)I wrote this over twenty years ago. It is still relevant to our world today. There were many times that I no longer believed that life evens out. For a time, I completely lost my faith in fairness, but now I am holding firmly onto it again.

“Life is amazing. And then it's awful. And then it's amazing again. And in between the amazing and awful it's ordinary and mundane and routine. Breathe in the amazing, hold on through the awful, and relax and exhale during the ordinary. That's just living: heartbreaking, soul-healing, amazing, awful, ordinary life. And it's breathtakingly beautiful.”      ― L.R. Knost

                                    

“

CHRISTMAS COUNTDOWN DAY 22

A  Christmas Wish

 Technology. It's the way of the future. 

Well, it has finally hit me. Christmas is just too soon! I want that week back that we didn't get because of a late Thanksgiving this year. I've actually been feeling a little bit on top of things lately. I've been pretty proud of myself that I have managed to write every day. I am not usually a person who makes challenges to herself. I know I can break them while feeling very little guilt. But this one (writing something every day until Christmas) has been going pretty well. Until today. Writing has been the easy part of this endeavor. There is a lot I've found to say about Christmas. The snag has been the pictures. Finding and uploading takes me a lot longer than putting the words together. Today the phone and computer are fighting. I think they are serious and want to end their relationship. I can't upload my photos. No matter how many times I try. My memory is low. I cleared my cache. I don't even know what those things mean. 

Today's post is postponed until tomorrow. Today I did some shopping. I usually follow a basic rule of never shopping on a Sunday. It sounds like a religious thing, but it's not. I just really don't like the wait and the crowds. I don't think I have ever, ever, ever shopped on the last Sunday before Christmas. And hopefully, never again. I will be out again tomorrow though. What is wrong with me this year?

I also wrapped. Well, a few things. I need more wrapping paper, too. And where are my gift tags?

No sugarplums for me tonight. I will be dreaming about electronic devices. The nightmare before Christmas.

A Fable

Once upon a time there was a girl. One day she had an idea. It was a marvelous idea. She was excited by this idea and wanted to keep it forever. But she was so busy, and didn't have time to share. she wrapped it up in a pretty box with a big bow and put it in a closet. Safe and sound, she sighed with relief, because now that idea was there whenever she was ready for it.

Life continued on, as it does. Soon she had another idea. This one was even better, so she put it in another box. This was a bigger box, with shiny paper, and gold ribbon. Years went by, and she kept saving her ideas. Things to make, stories to write, things to do, and things to think about were all put away in boxes in her closet. Eventually she needed more space, so she transferred all the boxes into a bigger room. She marveled at how all the boxes were different. There were beautiful boxes with big shiny bows, brown boxes with string, and even several that weren't much more than scribbled words on a tiny parcel. Some she remembered, and some she did not. But, luckily, they were all packed away. And so she went on with her life, secure in her mind that someday, all these wonderful gifts would be opened.

It's not that she wasn't busy. She grew from a girl, to a woman, from a mother to a grandmother. Her life was full of joy and abundance. At other times it was filled with sorrow, and unfathomable grief. At times it went slowly, and at other times she could barely turn around before another year was gone.

Eventually she began to notice that her ideas were starting to show up in other places. She didn't understand, because she knew that they were all locked up in her secret hiding place. But it happened more and more. She was confused because she knew those were her thoughts. Finally she decided it was time to open the boxes and put her wonderful plans into action.

She picked a sunshiny day for her mission, but the sun didn't last. She opened the nearest box and it was completely empty. She turned it upside down and shook it, but it was still empty. How odd, she thought to herself. She picked another one. It was round with amethyst paper and silver stars. She was sure it was probably a good one. Empty again, except for a tiny bit of star shaped glitter. Now she was starting to worry, and tore through all the other boxes, finding nothing but a little more glitter and plain old dust. Paper and ribbons of every color were all around. The little room seemed to be bursting with them.

She was despondent. What had happened to all her beautiful ideas? 

And then she had one more idea and decided to open a Ribbon store. She lived happily ever after, selling ribbons and dreams. She would always give this advice to all her visitors--"Don't tie them too tightly and be sure to use them up".

NOT QUITE THE END

Every fable needs a moral. Remember that our great ideas are not really our own. They are floating around in the universe, waiting for some one to grab them. If you wait too long, they will find someone else.  Don't let that happen.

 So many times in my life I have considered something, and then watched as another person turned it into a successful venture. I'm not nearly as ambitious as I used to be, but I am trying now to use the things that I have been keeping in boxes and in my head.  This little story of boxes of ideas first appeared to me almost half a life ago. And now I have finally written it down.

 

75 at 75--Part 2

 As promised, here is the second part of my helpful hints and useless information. As a disclaimer, I have to say that maybe I haven't actually accomplished all of these. But I am on the path.

38. Make a plan to visit somewhere that you have always wanted to go. It could be a country or a bookstore.

39. Work on a memoir, or even a scrapbook. 

40. Keep some records of the past, but don't save everything. 

41. Read the book "Swedish Death Cleaning." Sounds dismal but it isn't. Years ago, when I was a teen, I liked a novel that featured two spinster sisters who made sure to leave their house 'in dying order' whenever they left. I can't remember the name, and I wonder if they went out much.

42. Hang your pictures, but not too many. Every wall in my house used to look like a gallery wall. Now I'm trying to be a bit more minimalistic. The struggle is real.

43.  Have something you really believe is true, but be open to other people's beliefs too.

44. Try to learn the correct way to do things, but then make adjustments. This is true in the kitchen and in life.

45. Have a regular bedtime. For me, this is one of the hardest things ever.

46.  Get up before everyone else, even if it is only to have coffee.

47.  Make a book of little family stories.

48.  Have a  little space that is just your own.

49.  Visit your happy place. Mine has always been a bookstore. Especially the ones where nobody talks to me. And a coffee bar is a plus.

50.  Have something that you do everyday.

51. Rituals are important. Especially little ones.

52.  Pick a goal. Every day do something that gets you a little bit closer to it.

53.  Do something that scares you. And then remind yourself that you never have to do it again.

54.  Take your turn. I saw a sign on a narrow road near my house that says "Take turns". I love it. It sounds so much like signs I've seen in England.

55.  Only compare yourself to yourself.

56. Take enough photos.

57. Have a favorite:  place, book, food.

58.  Always try new things.  This applies to places, books, and food.

59.  Compliments can make a person's day. Be generous with your kind words.

60.  When you have a brilliant idea, write it down right away. 

61.  Keep a small notebook with you and on your nightstand. It's amazing how quickly those brilliant ideas can disappear!

62.  Don't be afraid to love with your whole heart.

63.  Don't feel like you need to swear. It has become the popular mode of conversation. I like to save my obscenities for the times those words are really necessary.

64.  Re-read a favorite book from your childhood. It's good to see it as an adult.

65.  Become an expert at something. It's your choice. I've heard that you become an expert after doing something 1000 times. Or 10,000 times. You will know.

66.  Mise en place. This French culinary term means to gather all your ingredients and to have everything in place before you begin. I think it can be used in many other situations. Not just cooking.

67.  Leave a legacy. And I don't mean money.

68.  Three ring binders and sheet protectors can really be useful for random organizing.

69.  Start sending cards to people again. Especially for no reason.

70.  I think we should all decorate with buntings and garlands. There is nothing quite so festive.

71.  I got through the saddest times by telling myself "Don't think. Don't think" when I was with other people. And then I fell apart whenever I needed to. Probably not the best advice, but it worked.

72.  The words I've hated the most are "You're so strong".

73.  Using white out tape in a calendar or address book is a genius idea. I don't know why I never thought of it sooner. (Thanks Tricia.)

74.  Always, Always tell your people that you love them.

75.  My favorite quote. I think it is from Cinderella.

Have courage and be kind.

Where there is kindness, there is goodness

And where there is goodness, there is magic.

A Meandering Path

Many, many years ago, I began to write a blog. I think it was going to be a sweet little blog, about babies, and children, decorating and crafting. Perhaps I even pictured myself in a pinafore. Swirling.  I don’t remember. Years have passed, and life doesn’t always stay as sweet and magical. Sometimes it has to be lived in extremes. I think that now my musings (and my Muses) are on a meandering path, going this a-way and that-way, backwards and forwards. Just the way that our days go.

Life has been good to us since I last wrote. It's been good since John and I became a couple. Old People Romance. Sigh.  A lot has happened, yet I never recorded it here. We love our house. Moving was one of the best things. Not the actual moving, of course, but the result. Selling the old house felt like it took forever, and was a little bit stressful. I guess St. Joseph really wasn't very happy about being buried in our front yard.  Sadly, I miss my little white cottage (the she shed) and our front porch. The rest of the house never really felt like my own. Even though it was a charming old farmhouse, our new house is much more sensible. Being sensible was never one of my virtues, but it works for me now.  We actually have more space, even though it is smaller. And we are trying not to be the Keepers of Things!

We have traveled with friends, family, and each other. My two traveling friends and I revisited my favorite place in the world (England) last fall. Costa Rica with all the Braffords happened in February. There were fifteen of us!  Clear Lake and Le Claire here in Iowa. A girls' trip to Omaha with my three daughters and teenager Tess will be this weekend. And the grand finale for the year will be an adventure in Italy in October. 

With all the birthdays, graduations, and celebrations, time goes so quickly. I think a lot about what I really want to do. I just had a birthday, so maybe that's why I feel so introspective lately. I always feel that birthdays are the real beginning to a new year and a good time to make plans.

I have been working on a big project. I want to get my old writings into book form. I have saved a lot of what I wrote before I ever had a blog. There are bits and pieces of wisdom and chaos, After I get it all organized it may be a book just for me, and especially for my children. I've spent a lot of time reliving the past and reading my old newsletters, columns, journals, and poetry.  I would love for it to turn into a real book of essays. 

For some unexplained reason, I stopped writing online this year. And now I am wanting to get my pencils sharpened and my voice back again. Any cheering on would be appreciated. Recently, I have been trying to start a little column on Substack. That seems to be where all the people I like to follow are now. So far it isn't going too well, because I can't figure it out. Technology has once again gotten the best of me. I dream of taking a computer class that just teaches me the things I want to know!

Hopefully, I have broken the curse of not having a thing to post. Please look for me again soon. 

October 31: It is Halloween #Blogtober2021

 Goodbye October! See you next year! I learned a lot about writing this month. I now realize that I don't have to wait for inspiration. I can come up with something to say every single day for a month. I plan to have a more set schedule now than before. I think I can manage two or three times a week. Hello, discipline. Thank you to every one who took the time to read the things I've found to say, and to comment or give an encouraging gesture.

October the Twenty Fourth: Reading and Writing #Blogtober2021

 Tonight I am taking a little break from Halloween. This blog post may be all over the place since it doesn't have a theme, but I am hoping something comes from my disconnected thoughts. Writing isn't always easy. Sometimes the words just flow, and that's when I feel compelled to write. For all the times I've written on my blog, I have almost always waited until I had something I wanted to say. And that is why I haven't written very often. (Also the photos. I never have photos available!!!) Usually I write about once a month, although at times I have gone much longer than that. By entering this challenge to write every day in October, I have learned that I can post something without waiting for my Muse to gently kick me in the backside. I have really enjoyed it, and I like to see what I come up with. I've said before that I feel like I am writing to myself, because it's really hard to know how many people actually see this. I have been pleasantly surprised at some of the "Likes" I've received. And I've wondered why it doesn't seem to reach many people. 

I've spent an excessive amount of time this month on the internet. I am researching, which I have always loved to do, but it does lead me down the rabbit hole. I am also trying to educate myelf about Facebook, and Blogger, and Instagram. I find it very complicated most of the time, but I am learning some new things. Just trying to put my words together takes a lot longer than the five minutes people give me by reading them.And I really appreciate that you do take that five minutes. I probably won't keep writing every day after the month ends, but I am wanting to make myself do this at least once or twice a week. A good friend told me recently that she doesn't read my blog as much now because I write too often, and that she doesn't have the time. So, I guess less must be better.

 I am working on a book of essays. I don't have really grand plans for it, but I want to have something for my friends and family. I think I must write because I like to see my words. I guess that's as good a reason as any other.