Many years ago, when my five children were growing up, and our house was in happy chaos, I heard the words "It's not fair" several times a day. Whether it was about who got the biggest treat, who went to bed first, or whose turn it was to wash the dishes, nothing was fair in their world. And my all purpose answer was always that it wasn't fair but it evens out.
Recently our world has been hit by too many things that make us want to shake our fists in the air and shout--"It isn't fair"--. War, protests, accidents, natural disasters, so many things that don't seem to have a reason. I like to know a reason for everything. I like rules. I like the fact of cause and result. Here are a few of the things that help me. These are the LifeRules that I am working toward. I don't always remember them, but when I do, they give my life a little more meaning and balance.
I believe we need to be generous. Many times I've noticed that what we give comes back to us in many ways. Always be willing to share what you have. Be generous with your time, with your money, and with yourself.
Do you know someone who just seems to be lucky? I have a couple of friends who are. I can count on them to be the winners at raffles and lotteries, to get the best seats, and to always have things given to them. I admit that sometimes I feel a little jealous and get a bad case of the Poor Me's and feel that life isn't fair. Yes, I have been known to whine. Over time, I have noticed that these lucky women are always giving. They think about others and are there with help, and gifts, and acts of kindness. And this generosity finds it way back to them again and again.
I believe we need to be grateful. Appreciate what you have, both the big and the small. Try to remember to take time to notice the miracles that surround us. The more you look, the more you will find.
And I believe we need to be prepared. We never know what the future holds. The only certainty about life is its' uncertainness. Have a plan, both for your day, and your future. Do you know what important things you would need in an emergency? Do you have the necessary supplies? Do you know what really matters to you and why? Take some time, take stock, and think about where you are going in life and what you need.
Life isn't fair, but it evens out. Remember that, because it keeps us traveling in the direction that we need to be moving.
2025 ADDENDUM:
Recently I have been sorting through some of my old writings. They are musings I wrote after I got my first computer, and years before I started a blog. Although many seem outdated now, I am dusting them off and posting them here on The Second Story. I am planning to put them all together for that elusive book I sometimes talk about. (It will at least be organized for my children.)I wrote this over twenty years ago. It is still relevant to our world today. There were many times that I no longer believed that life evens out. For a time, I completely lost my faith in fairness, but now I am holding firmly onto it again.
“Life is amazing. And then it's awful. And then it's amazing again. And in between the amazing and awful it's ordinary and mundane and routine. Breathe in the amazing, hold on through the awful, and relax and exhale during the ordinary. That's just living: heartbreaking, soul-healing, amazing, awful, ordinary life. And it's breathtakingly beautiful.” ―
